Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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