Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
