Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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