We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
