Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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