Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
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Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
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the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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