why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
