I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I've blown a few things in my day
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize
