I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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