I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
it was like having sex with a tree stump
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize