Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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