Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
