Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize