I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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