do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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