New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
