Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize
