well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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