haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'd cum for enchiladas.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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