I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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