okay pat passed out under dana's car
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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