I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
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JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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