For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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