I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
