i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
