real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
