He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Randomize