So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
