You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Randomize
