i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
my god I love twenty year old dicks
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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