He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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