Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
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