we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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