i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
