I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize