So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I queefed so loud it echoed.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
