Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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