when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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