Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
ttyl tear gas
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize