Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
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he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
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I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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