i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
