He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
