question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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