Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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