YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Couch. On fire.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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