margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
