Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
