If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
