Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
