that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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